And another baby.
Ok, I guess that was a little mean to post the last blog about a baby and not mention any news of our own.
You know, we just lost this last baby the last week of July. That is only 2 months ago. That was our second loss in just under a year. It was a hard thing for me to stomach simply because I had carried and borne 2 wonderful children with little to no problems and couldn’t understand why this was happening.
I was waiting and waiting after the miscarriage for a return to “normalcy” (I’m trying to spare you male readers the details) and it just didn’t happen.
So, after 3 weeks of feeling horrible and thinking that I had the worldest longest flu or malaria (which I am sure I did have the flu a bit) I finally took a pregnancy test as a last ditch effort. Those lines were immediate. That never happens with me!
I was a bit in shock, and very hesitant to say anything. I needed a follow-up with my doctor to figure out why the miscarriages were happening, so I made an appointment. Imagine her surprise when I informed her that we probably shouldn’t run all of the tests she was hoping to run cause I might just be pregnant. I think her jaw dropped a little before the smile spread over her face and she said something like, “Well, well?”
She took me down right then for an ultrasound and sure enough there was a baby. A heartbeat even. But a baby that looked too small for her calculations. She told me that either it was just a late “arrival” or that there was something wrong and that the baby was not growing. My heart sank. Not again I thought.
She decided that I would need an ultrasound in 2 weeks, at which time, the fetus would be measured for 2 weeks of growth, or the likelihood that the pregnancy was not viable.
SO, for those 12 days up until yesterday I have had this heaviness over me. Of course I trust that God knows my desires for another child, but still, it does not ease the fact that those were the longest days filled with waiting, and searching, and prayers from a few faithful prayer warrior friends of mine.
And then yesterday, my ultrasound.
It started out quite oddly because after I put my gown on and went to empty my bladder, the door to the bathroom (inside the exam room mind you) was locked. I looked with a quizzical look at the technician and nurse. They gave me the same look back and mouthed, “Is someone in there?” I shrugged. How should I know??
And there was someone in there!!! An older haggard looking Indian woman peeked her head out, asked for some tissue and then locked herself back in the bathroom for another eternity (it was really like 8 minutes). And then, as suddenly as it started, she came out looking all fresh and coiffed. We were all flabbergasted as the entire exam had been waiting on this woman leaving so I could go to the bathroom. She didn’t even exchange words with any of us. Just walked out. So strange and WEIRD!!!
So finally, with an empty bladder, the exam began, and immediately, there was this big ol fetus up on the screen. Way bigger than before and way bigger than 2 weeks growth. Turns out the baby was right on track for where it should have been before. No explanation for the 4 weeks growth in 2 weeks, other than the hand of God. There is was, a healthy 9week old fetus with a crazy strong heartbeat and everything looking strong and intact.
I wanted to cry. But I didn’t. But I did allow the fear to dissipate and excitement to enter my mind and heart over this new addition to our lives. As if our lives weren’t crazy enough, Yes, the May family is going to go and have a baby in Kenya. Join with us in praying over this little one in the next 7 months and for everything to go easily and smoothly.
We’re looking forward to our Kenyan baby arriving right around May 8th. Poor Eli, I don’t think it’s quite the birthday present he imagined!!
Oh, and for the humor portion of this blog:
Lucy was present with dad and I in the ultrasound. She wanted to know if the doctor was taking it out right then. Ian said, “No it has to cook a while longer.”
Later, Lucy said, “Are we going to eat the baby then?”
Eli asked, “Is this baby going to die too?” Bless his sweet spirit that understands so much more of this than Lucy.
Lucy informed me that she needs 2 baby sisters, “So we can all hold hands”.
Eli asked, “Does the baby come out your butt?” To which I simply said no. No further explanation provided at this point in time.
And then I made a quick escape and I told them “Good night!”